"This is the Stuff"

I remember the day I found out that I was pregnant with Brooklyn like it was yesterday. Jeremy was in California on a business trip.  I had to take Dylan to daycare that morning and then go get my oil changed. First thing out of bed I took the pregnancy test. Totally completely astonished by the results. I was so excited and yet so scared!!!! This was not planned....Dylan was only 10 months old....How in the world would I tell Jeremy?


On the way to drop Dylan off I remember the song "This is the Stuff" by Francesca Battistelli coming on the radio. It brought tears to my eyes but I was laughing because it fit so perfectly! If you aren't familiar with it here is the chorus:


This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff that's getting to me lately 
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed 
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I've gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing 
Might not be what I would choose 
But this the stuff You use

The song came on the radio the other day; of course I turned it up and sung at the top of my lungs. It didn't take me long to realize I was meant to hear that song that morning. That song still to this day means so much in my life and fits so perfectly.

I am not always extremely open with what an average day in my household looks like. Those of you who have witnessed it knows my "little mess" of a 2 year old and an 8 month old with a disiabilty might not be ordinary but its my "normal" and I am extremely blessed!! 

Our journey with Brooklyn might not always be what I would choose, but I have to remember that God knows exactly what He is doing. He has a plan for her and for our family. 

So break me of impatience
Conquer my frustrations
I've got a new appreciation
It's not the end of the world


See why this song fits me?? It has almost been a year this week since I got the call from my OB that started this journey... that there was something wrong. It has been a long waiting game since then. But God has taught me so much. He has changed my heart. Each and every bit of news the doctors tell us, I just add to my memory bank and keep on trekking!  It isn't the end of the world. Every day is a new day; a new day that God has given me and my beautiful family a breath of air to keep on going. God is the ultimate healer and physician and He knows exactly what he is doing.